Diagnosis, Paw Prints and a volley back to hope...

Summer hasn’t been my favorite season since I was ten. But this summer has been especially hard and last summer was also hard. I wanted to share some of what I’ve been through the last two summers because I know I’m not alone in my difficult journey. Life has been a lot for everyone. But I also know how I volley back to hope, which is how I keep going through the hard.

Here are just a few of the highlights (or low lights) of summer. Multiple diagnosis which I want to talk about, because I know that I am not the only one facing them and I am hopeful that my experience can help someone else. POTS, MCA, Spike Protein, auto immune induced DB on my eyes-. This is combined with the other issues I was already dealing with. Pots has made it where I often have to use assisted walking devices (depending on the severity of the attack) that may be a cane, a rollenator or a wheelchair. MCA is mass cell activation. It is my body literally treating everything as an enemy including itself, a lot of things I used to enjoy I no longer can. One of those is cinnamon, so I’ve experimented with a lot things to find a new option. So I’m excited to try a new pumpkin pie recipe without cinnamon.

I deal with two different types of endometriosis, one of which is primary umbilical endometriosis. This means I have a nodule and lesions that push through my navel and bleed. It is extremely painful and difficult to deal with. But for me another complication is that I am allergic to all medical tape and adhesive (including paper tape). So I’ve been trying to find an alternative to secure the gauze. My most recent fix, thanks to a combination of helpful advice from Instagram and Facebook was to take one of my more form fitting tank tops, cut off the top, fold it over and make it a belly band. I am happy and excited to say it worked! So until I can find a better solution, this holds my bandage in place without the need for adhesive.

Ahead of this bad endo flare we lost our Blazer dog, bestest boy, after almost thirteen years :’( which was devastating. I am thankful for every moment we got with him. He was listed terminal in 2022 due to tumors literally taking over his body and they told us we had at the most a year with him. But he made it to June 2026 and he did great until the last two weeks. At that time he very clearly let us know it was time to let him go. I still cry a lot, it is still so much more quiet with him gone. And I will miss him like crazy forever. He was my cuddle boy. We still have his toys with his scent on them. Because his sister (and litter mate) sometimes cries and won’t sleep until she has one of those with her. But she is doing better every day and I am beyond thankful to still have her with us.

I’m not even going to get into what all happened the year before because honestly I just need a break from the trauma of it all. But it’s been way too much the last couple of years especially, and I admit for me it has been a struggle to find that volley back to hope some days. But I am thankful beyond words that by some miracle I always do find my volley and the strength to keep going. Gratitude is such a gift on hard days. It takes me back through so many times I thought things looked hopeless but I still made it through. My faith, I have also become very very thankful for. Ever appreciative it is not based on church or religion but on the relationship I have with God that I have had since I was three. Long before anyone told me anything about Him. So I was free to establish my own belief in love.

So, I survive summer now (and I do truly try my best to find ways to enjoy and be present in it, even when its 110 degrees outside) and I countdown the days to fall and winter every year. Literally as soon as June hits I start planning for fall and Christmas, even if none of those plans actually happen lol. Faith and hope are two of the most powerful things in the world, so, I will focus on happier things, volley back to hope. I hope if you are struggling today that you also will find something that brings you joy, peace, hope. Something gives you purpose that pulls you through the hard stuff.

I wish you all hope, health and a happy rest of the summer! And I hope to have happy things to share soon!

Be honest, Be real, Be you

Bobbie De Leon